Princess Catherine’s Pantyhose

Say it isn’t so.

Pantyhose are coming back in style.  Well, maybe just in England.  Leave it to my favorite new princess to bring a clothing item that I detest back in style.  But, I’m not running out to the store to get my Legg’s Egg any time soon.

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This sums it up perfectly from ABC News:

“For the fashion forward Middleton, sheer pantyhose may seem like a throwback to the 1980s.

More than likely, Middleton, who pairs the shiny hose with her dresses for official appearances, is following royal protocol than making a fashion choice. But like everything else she touches that turns to gold, Middleton’s embrace of sheer pantyhose has them flying off the shelves in her native U.K.”

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If you were trying to describe this picture to a blind person, you would write, “lavender dress, powder pink shoes and shiny nude hose.”  God Save the Queen, that just sounds horrendous.  But look at it:  it looks, well, refined.  Ladylike.  Classy.

Shiny nude hose.  Shiny nude hose.  Shiny nude hose.  There, I’ve said it three times in a row and I still cannot talk myself into wearing them.  But as stated above, she is not trying to make a fashion statement, she HAS to wear them.  Covered arms, covered toes, pantyhose in public.  Period.  Welcome to your new life Kate.

PinPantyhose are your cross to bear, Kate, but they are not ours here in America.  I am NOT going back to the days, almost twenty years ago, when I had an ENTIRE drawer in my dresser devoted to pantyhose.  I shudder to think that when I went through sorority rush, I wore off-white hose with many of my outfits during the day–I guess I was channeling a Florence Nightengale look. I also remember wearing those instruments of torture during 100 degree summers during and after college when I worked in a law firm.  Nothing says “fresh” like a pair of nylons in the heat. Now, I have one pair of pantyhose, which I plan on cutting up to tie up my tomato plants (yes that is true, it works).

There are some benefits to pantyhose.  All veins and other leg blemishes are covered, so no more “spray hose.”  Everything is sucked in; it would be like wearing Spanx everyday.  Somehow I don’t think Kate has any of these issues.

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If you are so inclined to partake in this new trend, there is an entire website devoted to What Kate Wore that lists the “tights” (as they are called in England) that Kate wears:

• Wolford’s Naked 8 sheer pantyhose ($30)
• Falke Shelina 12 Ultra Transparent Hipster Tights ($19)
• John Lewis Barely There Non Slip Tights (£5)

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Now Keep Calm and Carry On.  Don’t all run to the mall at once to start buying your new “tights.”  Maybe ease into the trend, waiting until it reaches a high temperature of 80 rather than 100 degrees.